For Scott Part 2

So last week I posted about some typical conversations I had with a close friend of mine... Well, I was unable to recover a few more for your reading pleasure:

DS: I am really worried about losing my house, I just cannot afford the mortgage anymore and maybe foreclosed on.
ME: (removing calculator from it's holster) Click Click Click.... If I sell my house, cash in all my stocks, leave my wife....Click Click Click.... I would have $532,968.23
DS: How does that help me?
ME: And then, Click Click Click.... I get my inheritance for another 80K after taxes which really puts me at...Click Click Click....$612,968.23 (go ahead and do the math if you want to...mgmt)
I can get a small apartment and use stacks of twenties as furniture.
DS: Why would you do all that?
ME: Why Not!!! memememmemememememememememememememememememememe

SD: I have a great idea...
DS: What is it?
ME: Click Click Click
SD: We pool all our resources and go into business for ourselves. Since we do all the work, we may as well reap all the benefits. We can work from home and be our own bosses.
DS: I love it... but how can we afford to do this?
ME: Click Click Click
SD: We would need ME to put up the money in the beginning to get things going, and then ME would get the largest percentage of the profits until his initial investment is returned.
ME: HUH!!!
DS: We can do it, even if we just earn what we are getting now... we are still doing it ourselves.
ME: HUH!
SD: Exactly
ME: Click Click Click... I would need to discuss this with my wife.
DS: You mean the one you plan on leaving every day of the week.
SD Exactly
ME: I thought about it... and NO! NO WAY... Click Click Click
DS: Why Not?
SD: Why Not?
ME: Why!!!
ME: me me me me me me me me me me me me me me (driving off in his new Benz)
Epilogue: The results of this partnership being squashed... two divorces, two homes lost, a move out of state and a combined year of unemployment. Thanks Me!!! click click click.
And BTW... it would have worked.

SD: I just cannot get to work on time anymore, no matter what time I leave, I am late.
DS: I am sorry, I will do my best to cover for you until you get in.
ME: Click Click Click.... where is SD (looking at his watch... it's 10am) I need him to get here and do his job so I can get paid.
DS: He is on his way, he had to take care of his mom.
ME: His mom??? Can't she take care of herself? Click Click Click... this is costing me money and time. I need to get outside for a smoke...
DS: He will be here, don't worry.
SD: (calling from his cell) I am around the corner and will be right there.
DS: Hey ME... he will be here in a second... ME... ME... where the hell is ME now?
Oh look, he is in Glynne's (name changed to protect the innocent) office... what the hell is she crying about now..
SD: (at his desk) Where is ME?
DS: I think he has been in Weepy's office for the last 3 hours.
SD: I have the info he needs, can you get him out of there?
DS: (on paging system) ME... you have a call on line one... I think it is the bank.
ME: (crashing through door of Weepy's office and racing at top speed to his phone) me me me memem me me me mem me em me me me me
DS: I thought that would get him out of there...
SD: Exactly

Thanks to the R.O. Players.. ME, SD and DS.